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ScreenVue is the result of a joint venture and partnership between Christian Video Licensing International (CVLI) and Christian Copyright Licensing International (CCLI) and Motion Picture Licensing Corporation (MPLC).

ScreenVue first launched in 2003 as a service of CVLI. The CVLI Church Video License provides legal coverage for churches and for other ministry organizations to show DVDs, Blu-rays, movie downloads and streams of motion pictures. Each organization needs to be specifically covered. Coverage includes playing just a few seconds of a movie all the way up to showing the full-length feature.

Each *Total Producer Church Video License* and *Standard CVLI Video License* (or any *Church Video Licence* globally) comes with free ScreenVue Vault access.

The ScreenVue Vault offers 11,000+ Scene Ideas and Downloads from a variety of movies and resources. 

ScreenVue saves you hours of time finding that perfect movie illustration for next Sunday’s sermon, child or youth service, or video announcement! 

All Scene Ideas (using your own copy or rental; via Blu-ray, DVD, streaming or download) include a scene summary, themes and time cues. 

With Scene *Downloads, simply preview, download and use instantly. 

(*ScreenVue does not sell or rent entire digital copies of movies to download. To purchase or rent entire movies, please access services like Amazon, Google or Vudu).

About Us


### CCLI

Christian Copyright Licensing International (CCLI) was established in 1988 to provide churches with simple, affordable solutions to complex copyright issues. CCLI helps churches maintain their integrity while giving them the freedom to worship expressively and spontaneously.

Churches often face copyright infringement issues in two areas: 1) copying music without permission, and 2) showing movies without authorization.

For copying music to assist with congregational singing, the Church Copyright License provides blanket coverage for 300,000+ songs and 4,500+ publishers and song owners. Currently, global churches are using 600,000+ CCLI licenses.

---

### CVLI

From a unique partnership between Christian Copyright Licensing International (CCLI) and Motion Picture Licensing Corporation (MPLC), Christian Video Licensing International (CVLI) and the Church Video License was formed in 2001.

The Church Video License provides churches with legal coverage to show all, or any portion of, thousands of movie titles from a number of movie producers, including all the major studios. Currently, the titles from almost 3,000 producers are represented by the Church Video License, including the titles that contain all the Scene Ideas and Scene Downloads that are part of the ScreenVue Vault.

---

### MPLC

Motion Picture Licensing Corporation (MPLC) was founded in 1986 by former MGM executives and an MPAA attorney. Their goal was to develop a process to help the public leverage the work of the creative community without infringing on copyright.

With decades of experience, MPLC has become the world leader in licensing movies, TV programs, and other content for public performances. Through its Umbrella License® MPLC provides a comprehensive copyright compliance solution that is simple and affordable.

MPLC works closely with a variety of institutions, associations, and antipiracy groups to educate the public about copyright and promote the intellectual property rights of the creative community.

Today, MPLC licenses over 500,000 locations worldwide, including, but not limited to, nonprofit organizations, corporations, and government entities.


Partners

## Privacy is Important to ScreenVue.

We’re committed to using the data that you share with us to provide the best possible service and experience. This Privacy Policy explains when and why we collect personal data, how we use it, and how we keep it secure.

When you provide us with personal data or use our websites, you agree to be bound by this policy which we may update from time to time.

### Our Privacy Principles


- We will only collect personal data that is relevant to the services we provide, handle it securely and retain it only as long as necessary.
-  We will always ask you for your communication preferences and make it simple to change them.
-  We will not sell or give your information to a third-party organization other than our trusted service providers who provide certain secure business functions on our behalf
-  Our websites and online services only use temporary ‘session’ cookies to enhance your online experience. We do not use cookies to collect personally identifying information.

The information below provides more detail about how we use your data.

- Who We Are
- The Information We Collect
- How and Why We Use Personal Data
- How We Protect Your Personal Data
- Your Personal Data and Service Providers
- Your Personal Data and Marketing
- How We Use Cookies
- Google Analytics
- Comment Policy
- Update and Access Your Data: Your Rights and Control
- 

---


## Who We Are

ScreenVue is an international organization headquartered in the United States, with offices around the world. As such, many of our systems and online services are employed globally.

We are strongly committed to maintaining the privacy of your personal information and the security of our computer systems and online services.

Concerning the collection, use, and disclosure of personal information, ScreenVue makes every effort to ensure compliance with all applicable laws, including the European General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR), the all other local privacy regulations.

---

## The Information We Collect

When you purchase licenses or services from ScreenVue, we will require only the personal information that is necessary for the administration of your account with us.

As a general rule, we do not collect personally-identifying information about you when you visit our websites or online services and we will retain only the information you choose to share with us.

When you sign up for CVLI/ScreenVue’s licenses or services, you may provide some or all of the following:

- Your title, name, email, postal address, and telephone numbers. 
- Usernames and passwords that you have chosen to log in to secure ScreenVue services.

When you use our websites and online services we collect:

- Information about the licenses and subscriptions that you purchase from us including your method of payment.
- Information about the pages visited, and links clicked, including the date and time.
- The internet address of the website from which you linked directly to our site.
- Information about the devices you have used, including mobile device identifiers, operating system, IP address and type of browser.

Our websites contain links to other websites. When you leave a ScreenVue website by linking to any of these sites, you are subject to the privacy policy of those sites.

When you interact with us through email, social media, surveys or promotions, we may collect:

- Personal data that you freely provide about yourself that is relevant to the nature of the interaction, such as your name, username and email address. 
- Details of the emails you open, and links clicked.
- Your comments in forums and feedback from surveys.

If you identify yourself by sending an e-mail containing personal information requesting that we mail information to you, we will use this information solely for responding to such requests and for our records. We may forward your e-mail to other ScreenVue employees who are better able to serve you.

### Data obtained from other sources
We may obtain personal data from other legitimate sources, including trusted third-party providers, and use this data to:

Verify and correct the information we hold.

- Send information about license renewal and account management.
- Send marketing communications by post or email.
- Initiate or deliver targeted content via online advertising and social media.


---


## How And Why We Use Personal Data

ScreenVue will only collect and retain data that is required to administer your account or improve your experience; and we will provide you with information that we believe is important, in your interest to know, or that you have permitted us to send.

We use your data in the following ways:

To make our services available to you

- Ensuring that the administration of your account is simple and secure. 
- Enabling us to provide the services you require and to process orders and refunds efficiently.
- Enabling us to provide support and respond to inquiries quickly and accurately.
- Where ScreenVue acts as an agent for other rightsholder organizations and you hold one of their licenses, we may be required to share your data with them.

To improve the way we operate and communicate

- The data we hold about you enables us to improve our internal systems and our range of services.
- By monitoring the use of our services, we can detect and prevent misuse and fraud and ensure that they can be accessed safely and securely.
- We use web technologies such as cookies to improve the way our websites and online services work. Some cookies are necessary and, if disabled, will limit functionality and affect your user experience.
- We use tools like Google Analytics to help us understand our users’ experience (e.g., how much time they spend on web pages, which links they choose, what they do and don’t like, etc.).
- User feedback helps us build and maintain our services, determine technical design specifications and monitor system performance.

To ensure our communications are relevant and valuable

- Interactions and browsing behavior help us understand you better and determine what is of most and least interest, meaning we can personalize our services, marketing communications, and promotions and measure their effectiveness.
- We’re committed to respecting your marketing preferences and making it easy to change them.

### Consequences of Not Providing Your Data
You are not obligated to provide your personal information to ScreenVue, LLC. However, ScreenVue is unable to issue and administer copyright licenses, services and agreements without it.

---

## How We Protect Your Personal Data
ScreenVue takes the protection of your data very seriously.

- We use firewalls and data encryption to protect data that is stored electronically, and we take appropriate measures to ensure that our buildings and any files we store physically are secure.
- Whenever we collect or disclose personal data, we employ physical, electronic and procedural safeguards to ensure its safety. Consequently, we may ask you for proof of identity before we can disclose personal information to you.
- We encrypt all data that is transferred electronically using the industry standard Secure Sockets Layer (SSL)
- When your data is transferred, stored or processed in a different country, we employ appropriate measures to ensure that your data remains secure.

We cannot guarantee the security of any email provider or online service which is not managed by us, and which you use to transfer data to us.

---

## Your Personal Data and Service Providers
ScreenVue works with reputable service providers who may process your data to perform business functions on our behalf. These include Google Analytics, MailChimp/Mandrill, SurveyGizmo and others.

All such service providers are contractually required to keep your data safe, use it only for the purposes agreed, and delete it when it is no longer required. They have agreed not share it, nor use it for their marketing purposes.

We will never give, sell or share your personal data with any third-party for any purpose other than that referred to above.

---

## Your Personal Data and Marketing
ScreenVue would like to share potentially valuable or interesting information with you and, from time to time, ask for your feedback via online surveys.

- When you provide us with your personal data, either by phone, email or a physical or online form, we will always provide a clear and simple way to confirm your communication preferences.
- We will never assume your consent to receive email marketing. We will only send you marketing emails where you have opted-in to receive them.
- We may give you the opportunity to opt-in to receive different marketing emails based on your interests. An opportunity to unsubscribe from any list will be clearly provided at the bottom of each email.
- We may mail information to you that we believe will be of legitimate interest.
- We will make it simple for you to change your communications preferences, which you can do at any time online, over the phone or by writing to us.

---

## How We Use Cookies
A ‘cookie’ is a file placed on your personal computer’s hard drive by a website.

ScreenVue employs cookies to optimize its service to customers. We do not use cookies to collect personally identifying information from users, nor to track user activities beyond our websites. ScreenVue does not maintain copies of cookies on our websites after you leave them.

Cookies store and exchange small pieces of temporary data between a website and a user’s computer which enable a “session” or “dialogue” between the two machines. With the session established, ScreenVue can tailor its responses (i.e., provide you with the information you want) and help you traverse our web pages efficiently and effectively.  A session is broken when you exit your browser.

ScreenVue uses “session cookies” — (i.e., temporarily stored cookies in your computer’s memory). Session cookies are normally deleted from a user’s computer when the user logs off the computer, or the user exits the browser.

For security purposes and to ensure that this service remains available to all users, our websites also employ systems to monitor network traffic to identify unauthorized attempts to upload or change information, or otherwise cause damage.

Unauthorized attempts to upload information or change information on this service are strictly prohibited and may be punishable under the law.

---

## Google Analytics
Google Analytics is a web analytics service that uses cookies stored on your computer to collect and report website usage data.  We use Google Analytics to understand how visitors use our websites and to identify where we can improve our content and services.  Google collects the IP address you use when you visit the site but does not collect any other personal information about you.  We do not combine the information that Google collects with any other personally identifiable information.

[Learn more about how your data is collected by Google](https://policies.google.com/privacy "Learn more about how your data is collected by Google")

[Prevent your data from being used by Google Analytics](https://tools.google.com/dlpage/gaoptout "Prevent your data from being used by Google Analytics")

---

## Comment Policy
Comments on articles, blogs and videos can be helpful to other viewers, provided that a spirit of helpfulness is the intent of the person doing the commenting.

We review all comments on ScreenVue’s websites. We reserve the right to edit/delete spam comments, duplicate comments, unsupported accusations, vulgar comments, vile comments, personal attacks of any kind, terms offensive to groups when used in a derogatory manner, and any other comment deemed inappropriate at our discretion.

We reserve the right to ban offenders who post comments under another person’s name, submit an egregious comment or repeatedly submit comments that do not meet our standards.

---

## Update and Access Your Data: Your Rights and Control
As a benefit of using ScreenVue’s services, we provide you with a way to update your information.  These features allow you to quickly update your personal information at any time, including your name, email address, and profile image.

We are committed to safeguarding your privacy and can only do so if you use ScreenVue Profile features as intended.  Some or all aspects of this Privacy Policy may not apply to individuals who share a login (email and password) with other members of an organization account.

If you believe the information that ScreenVue holds about you is incorrect and you are unable to correct it through our ScreenVue Profile service, please contact us, and we will update our records as soon as possible.

You have the right to see the personal data that we hold about you. However, how we deal with such requests, and whether we charge a fair administration fee may differ depending on the law in the country of your residence.

In all cases, if you would like a copy of the personal data we hold about you, please contact us using our [GDPR / Data Privacy contact form](mailto:support@screenvue.com "GDPR / Data Privacy contact form").

ScreenVue is committed to protecting your personal data and using it only in a manner that is appropriate, fair and transparent. If, however, you have a concern about our use of your data or wish to make a complaint,please contact us using our GDPR / Data Privacy contact form. We will take all reasonable steps to resolve your query or complaint and to do so promptly.



Privacy Policy

The ScreenVue, LLC web site shall be defined herein to include all screenvue.com and all other web pages operated by ScreenVue.

ScreenVue makes available information, materials, and products on this Web site subject to the following terms and conditions. By accessing this site, you agree to the terms and conditions as outlined in this legal notice. ScreenVue reserves the right to change these terms and conditions from time to time at its sole discretion.

__Copyright © 2019 by ScreenVue, LLC. All rights reserved. CVLI® and Screenvue® are trademarks. All other trademarks are properties of their respective owners.__

---

## Use of Software
Any use of software and accompanying documentation from this Web site is subject to the terms of a software license agreement between you and ScreenVue. You must read the license agreement and indicate your agreement to its terms prior to installing or using the software. All rights, title, and interest not expressly granted are reserved.

---

## Use of Web Site Information
Except as otherwise indicated elsewhere on this site, you may view, copy, print, and distribute documents available on this Web site subject to the following conditions:

- The document may be used solely for personal, informational, non-commercial purposes.
- The document may not be modified or altered in any way.
- The following copyright notice and permission notice must appear in each document: “Copyright © 2019 ScreenVue, LLC. All rights reserved.”
- ScreenVue reserves the right to revoke such authorization at any time, and any such use shall be discontinued immediately upon written notice from ScreenVue.
- Documents specified above do not include the design or layout of this Web site. Elements of this Web site are protected by trade dress and other laws and may not be copied or imitated in whole or in part.

---

## Warranties and Disclaimers
Except as expressly provided otherwise in an agreement between you and ScreenVue, all information and software on this Web site are provided “as is” without warranty of any kind, either express or implied, including, but not limited to, the implied warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, or non-infringement.

ScreenVue assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions in the information or software or other documents which are referenced by or linked to this Web site. References to corporations and their services and products are provided “as is” without warranty of any kind, either express or implied. In no event shall ScreenVue be liable for any special, incidental, indirect, or consequential damages of any kind, or any damages whatsoever, including, without limitation, those resulting from loss of use, data, or profits, whether or not advised of the possibility of damage, and on any theory of liability, arising out of or in connection with the use or performance of this information.

This Web site could include technical or other inaccuracies or typographical errors. Changes are periodically added to the information herein; these changes will be incorporated in new editions of this Web site. ScreenVue may make improvements and/or changes in the product(s) and/or the program(s) described in this Web site at any time.

This Web site can be accessed from other countries around the world and may contain references to ScreenVue products, services, and programs that have not been announced in your country. These references do not imply that ScreenVue intends to announce such products, services, or programs in your country.

---

## Feedback
Except where expressly provided otherwise by ScreenVue, all comments, feedback, information, or materials submitted to ScreenVue through or in association with this Web site shall be considered non-confidential and ScreenVue’s property. By submitting such comments, feedback, information, or materials to ScreenVue, you agree to a no-charge assignment to ScreenVue of all worldwide rights, title, and interest in copyrights and other intellectual property rights to the comments, feedback, information, or materials. ScreenVue shall be free to use such comments, feedback, information, or materials on an unrestricted basis.

---

## Links To Third-Party Web Sites
This Web site contains links to third-party Web sites. The linked sites are not under the control of ScreenVue, and ScreenVue is not responsible for the contents of any linked site or any link contained in a linked site. ScreenVue is providing these links only as a convenience, and the inclusion of a link does not imply endorsement of the linked site by ScreenVue.

---

## Governing Law And Jurisdiction
ScreenVue controls this Web site from its offices in Vancouver, Washington, USA. All matters relating to this Web site shall be governed by U.S. federal law or the laws of the State of Washington. You agree that any legal action or proceeding related to this Web site must be instituted in, and jurisdiction and venue are proper in, a state or federal court in Clark County, Washington. Your use of this Web site and its information must comply with all applicable local laws or regulations, and with U.S. export laws and regulations.

Terms

__FREE with a Church Video License,*__ the ScreenVue Vault offers 11,000+ Scene Ideas, Views, and Downloads from a variety of movies and resources. 

__ScreenVue saves you hours of time__ finding that perfect movie illustration for next Sunday’s sermon, child or youth service, or video announcement! 

__[Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)](https://www.screenvue.com/faqs "FAQ's")__
![ImageSpaceLG](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/4xvfeylbjqZEW7OapGd8H5/3a1eee9a2b5df7a2282086b9f0656f4c/ImageSpaceLG.png)
__WHAT RESOURCES ARE OFFERED BY THE SCREENVUE VAULT?__

The ScreenVue Vault offers THREE different types of SCENES:
![ImageSpaceSM](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/2MPfeE8Nyrtovp52LyLJXG/d240766f24d2e2163fcfa9d7f50eb3f5/ImageSpaceSM.png)
![clip-idea-icon](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/6AhofNH591NHsVrQKd2DXH/466532d661e3732758370bdcf0ef6473/clip-idea-icon.png)
__SCENE IDEAS:__ Use your own movie with our cues and details

To use a SCENE IDEA

- Sign-In.
- Select a Scene (by selecting a MOVIE, a THEME, or by using SEARCH). 
- Utilize the displayed Start/End Times, synopsis, and suggested themes.
- Have the specific movie cued to the appropriate Start Time (using the Digital, Stream, Blu-ray, or DVD you already own, rented or borrowed).
- You're now ready to show the Scene at just the right time in your message!

![SVViewIcon2](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/3YgYqNCCO4KFGqrFIjT1ra/ef2ecf0139ccb9c4a7c54bb8a3f34b2a/SVViewIcon.png)
__SCENE VIEWS:__ Preview and stream for use

To use a SCENE VIEW

- Sign-In.
- Select a Scene (by selecting a MOVIE, a THEME, or by using SEARCH). 
- If desired, have the Scene cued to a specific start time.
- You're now ready to show the Scene at just the right time in your message!

![clip-download-icon](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/610dtwW1MFbAh8RuFlLX7R/964977cd3211364b3a53b350995b6c73/clip-download-icon.png)

__SCENE DOWNLOADS:__ Preview, download and use instantly

To use a SCENE DOWNLOAD

- Sign-In.
- Select a Scene (by selecting a MOVIE, a THEME, or by using SEARCH).
- Click the PREVIEW button to preview the Scene first, if desired.
- Click the DOWNLOAD button.
- Click SAVE, and specify where you want the file saved to.
- Implement the file into your chosen presentation software.
- You're now ready to show the Scene at just the right time in your message!
![ImageSpaceSM](//images.ctfassets.net/micoswd5fgp1/2MPfeE8Nyrtovp52LyLJXG/d240766f24d2e2163fcfa9d7f50eb3f5/ImageSpaceSM.png)

__Filtering Scenes__
At the top navigation of any page, there are links to see: "All Scene Ideas," or "All Scene Views," or "All Scene Downloads."

When you click on a Theme and see the results, there is a "Filter Scenes" option to show: All Scenes, Scene Views Only, Scene Downloads Only, or both Scene Views and Downloads Only.

__Please Note__

*ScreenVue Vault content can only legally be used in tandem with a [Church Video License](https://store.ccli.com/).

*Before using ScreenVue content, please check your country’s Authorised Producers List to confirm the content is covered (all ScreenVue content is covered in the USA).

*ScreenVue Vault access is free with a Total Producer Package or Standard CVLI Video License in the USA or with any Church Video Licence globally.

*CVLI & ScreenVue do not necessarily endorse the entire content of any movie listed. Before showing any movie, in whole or in part, please preview and determine if the footage is appropriate for your intended audience.

*ScreenVue does not sell or rent entire digital copies of movies to download. To purchase or rent entire movies, please access services like Amazon, Google or Vudu.

__Email for ScreenVue support__
[support@screenvue.com ](mailto:support@screenvue.com "support@screenvue.com")

__[Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)](https://www.screenvue.com/faqs "FAQ's")__


Support

__Frequently Asked Questions...__

__"I'M NEW - how does the ScreenVue Vault work?"__
- To get a full explanation of how the ScreenVue Vault works, please visit our support page: https://www.screenvue.com/support

__"Where can I find my Access Key to sign-in with?"__
- Every Church Video Licence globally and every *Total Producer Church Video License* (or *Standard CVLI Video License*) in the USA comes with FREE access to the ScreenVue Vault, which is unlocked with your Access Key. Your Access Key will be included in the monthly CVL update emails you receive. If you can't find your Key, please email us at: [support@screenvue.com ](mailto:support@screenvue.com "support@screenvue.com")

__"Why won't my Access Key work?"__
- The usual reason for the Access Key not to work (and a footer error message to appear) is that something is missing from the sign-in protocol.
- Enter the *Email address* associated with your Church Video License (or CCLI account).
- Enter the *Access Key* found in your last CVL update email (exactly, with no spaces).
- Select the *Terms of Use* and a *Keeping in Touch* option.
- You should be in! If you have done all this and still have a problem, please let us know and we'll dig further.

__"In the USA, why don't I have access as a CVL Family Values Package member?"__
- The *CVL Family Values Package* offers only 65+ studios and producers, and does not include any major/minor Hollywood studios - and does not come with ScreenVue Vault access. 
- The *CVL Total Producer Package* offers 4,000+ studios and producers, including every major Hollywood studio and most of the major/minors, and comes with complimentary access to the new ScreenVue Vault: unlocked with a provided Access Key. 
- In the USA, to gain access to the new ScreenVue Vault, please upgrade to a *Total Producer package* by calling: __1-888-771-2854__.

__"What is the difference between Scene Ideas, Scene Views, and Scene Downloads?"__
- The ScreenVue Vault offers THREE different types of Scenes: 
- *Scene Ideas*: Has the "light-bulb icon," where you would use your own movie (Digital, Stream, Blu-ray, or DVD you already have access to) with our cues and details; as this scene is not available as a View or Download. 
- *Scene Views*: Has the "TV icon," where you can preview and stream for use.
- *Scene Downloads*: Has the "download icon," which you can preview, download and use instantly.
- Please visit our Support page for more details: https://www.screenvue.com/support.

__"Why can't I download a Scene Idea or Scene View?"__
- We do not have permission from the studio owners to offer downloads for most Scenes. Instead, use the cues listed in the upper, right hand corner of a Scene Idea in tandem with your own copy or rental, or preview and use a Scene View. The ScreenVue Vault offers THREE different types of Scenes: 
- *Scene Ideas*: Has the "light-bulb icon," where you would use your own movie (Digital, Stream, Blu-ray, or DVD you already have access to) with our cues and details; as this scene is not available as a download. 
- *Scene Views*: Has the "TV icon," where you can preview and stream for use.
- *Scene Downloads*: Has the "download icon," which you can preview, download and use instantly.
- Here is a link to all the movies which have Scene Downloads: https://www.screenvue.com/scene-downloads
- Here is a link to all the movies which have Scene Views: https://www.screenvue.com/scene-views
- When you click on a *Theme* and see the results, there is a "Filter Scenes" option to show: All Scenes, Scene Views Only, Scene Downloads Only, or both Scene Views and Downloads Only.
- Please visit our Support page for more details: https://www.screenvue.com/support.

__"What are the restrictions for streaming our service and including a movie scene? "__
- For churches that stream their services and want to include any part of a movie (the entire film or just a scene), the Church Video License terms do not cover streaming a movie scene - even if used in a sermon - over the internet to the general public.
- However, it is permissible to live stream a movie scene inside the facility as long as it is a closed-stream (not accessed publicly). 
- In light of COVID-19, the Church Video License has made temporary modifications to the license: For churches that stream their services and want to include any part of a movie, they can use a platform that is gated or private (password protected entry to only members and guests and not open to the general public), such as Zoom (requiring a password to join).

__"Can content in the ScreenVue Vault be used with a Church Video Licence anywhere in the world?"__
- Before using ScreenVue content, please check your country’s Authorised Producers List to confirm the content is covered (all ScreenVue content is covered in the USA).

FAQs

Header

Themes

All Scene Ideas

All Scene Views

All Scene Downloads

Mobile

Night at the Museum Secret of the Tomb

Mickey Rooney

Steve Coogan

Rebel Wilson

Owen Wilson

Robin Williams

Shawn Levy

Dan Stevens

Ben Stiller

Dick Van Dyke

Ben Kingsley

Octavius, a Roman centurion, and Jedediah, an cowboy from the Old West, are laughing uproariously at an online video of a cat chasing a light.  The two men from past ages are finding their experiences of modern technology extremely enjoyable.  Octavius has even constructed a giant machine that helps him type (Octavius and Jedediah are the size of small rodents).  Octavius, to his soldiers: "I should like to comment.  Summon the apparatus!"  The tiny soldiers slowly wheel a huge machine to the giant keyboard.  Octavius, directing his soldiers to type: "L!"  The soldiers move the heavy machinery until an "L" is typed onscreen.  Octavius: "O!"  Again, the soldiers use the machine to type the single letter.  Octavius, finishing: "L!"  Jedediah approves of Octavius's response: "Laugh out loud.  Yeah, that's what I did."  Octavius, importantly, as if standing before the Roman consul: "Now, post these adorable kittens with my edict of approval to Facebook!"  Jedediah: "Give a big Texas 'H--l yeah' from Old Jedediah because I loved it, too!"  Octavius: "Just send a smiley face."  Jedediah: "Yeah, but with a wink!"  Soldier, gravely, to the men: "A smiley face and a wink!"  The men operating the machine comply with orders, and a winking smiley appears onscreen.  (Caution: h-word used)

Larry and Nick are travelling to London together a few months before Nick graduates high school.  While they stroll alongside the Thames, Larry tells Nick that he thinks his new plan of taking a year off before college might be a good one.  Nick, excited, begins to open up and tell his father of his intention to become a DJ in Spain.  Immediately, Larry's approval of the plan disappears, and he begins to remind Nick of all the difficulties of pursing that course.  Nick, discouraged, accusing his dad of freaking out, but Larry's intention is only to see his son succeed.  Finally, Nick admits that he's considering not attending college at all.  Larry, concerned, questions the wisdom of such a decision, but Nick responds by reminding Larry that he himself didn't attend college.  The father, knowing the struggles he had in life, wants to see his son in a better place.  Nick, feeling his dad doesn't support his burgeoning adulthood: "Whatever, man.  Don't worry about me.  It's fine."  Larry: "Hey, I'm always gonna worry about you.  I'm your dad."

Larry, discovering Laaa eating Styrofoam, decides to give the caveman a job to keep him out of the way.  Leading Laaa to a door, he puts his hands up against it, ordering Laaa to stand guard.  Laaa copies Larry's stance, grunting his agreement.  However, when Larry moves away to return to the others, Laaa follows, a vacant grin on his face.  Larry, leading Laaa back to the door, repeats his orders, firmly: "Stay here, and put your hands on the door!"  Laaa obeys, nodding.  But, when Larry starts to leave, Laaa again begins to follow.  Larry turns back, again explaining Laaa's task.  Finally, Laaa seems to understand.  Larry leaves Laaa standing guard, both hands placed squarely on the doors.

Larry introduces himself to Lancelot, who immediately recognizes in him someone he knew in Camelot.  Larry is flattered, assuming that Lancelot is comparing him to a brave knight.  Lancelot corrects his mistaken impression, telling Larry that he reminds him of the court fool, Erik.  Larry's face assumes a wooden expression, reflecting his dislike of the comparison.  Lancelot, effusive in his praise of the fool: "He was so good, he didn't have to do anything.  He could just walk into a room and you'd laugh."  Lancelot, looking at Larry's deadpan face: "You have what he had...the gift.  You could be a fool!"  Larry, preferring the role of knight, tries to change the subject, but Lancelot is passionate in his appreciation of Larry's talent.  Larry makes only a few monosyllabic replies to Lancelot's comments and the knight is thrown into laughter, recognizing in Larry the natural talent of the born comedian.

Larry and his friends have come to ask Pharaoh for help with the magical tablet.  When Larry presents his request to the Egyptian ruler, Pharaoh orders him to kiss his staff.  Larry, uncomfortable, refuses.  Pharaoh, angrily: "I am the descendant of Ra, the sun god!"  Larry, placating: "I understand that, and I totally respect you.  I just don't pray to Ra, so..."  Pharaoh, firmly: "The Egyptian gods are the only true gods."  Larry, tolerantly: "Well, we try to stay a little more open-minded."  Larry points around the eclectic group of friends: "Sacajawea, she honors her spiritual ancestors..."  Looking at Attila the Hun, who nods, Larry adds: "You pray to some sort of goat-god, Attila?"  Larry turns back to Pharaoh: "I'm half Irish, half Jewish, so - -"  Pharaoh interrupts, with apparent pleasure: "I love Jews!  We owned 40,000 of them!  They were very happy, always singing with the candles."  Larry, dryly: "Yeah, they weren't happy."  Shepseheret, surprised: "Really?"  Larry: "No. They left.  They spent about 40 years in the desert trying to escape.  Yeah.  We have dinner once a year and talk about it.  It's a big deal for us."

Larry and Laaa are locked in an employee kitchen.  Laaa, a caveman of limited intelligence who believes Larry is his father, watches Larry and mimics everything he does.  Larry, angry he can't open the door, hits it, yelling: "D--n it!"  Laaa, yelling an intelligible word, hits the vending machine.  Larry, frustrated that he has become an unintentional mentor: "Laaa, if you see me do something dumb, don't imitate me, okay?"  Larry, talking to himself, realizes out loud that the situation is similar to his life with his teenage son.  While Larry discusses his struggles in his relationship with his son, he wanders around the kitchen, searching for a way to escape.  Laaa follows Larry everywhere, copying his movements.  When Larry gets a butter knife and begins to try to pry open the door, Laaa gets a butter knife and tries to pry open the microwave door.  Laaa, of course, is mildly electrocuted.  However, like a proud son, he still attempts to do everything his father-figure does.  Larry sits down, tossing his flashlight on the table.  Laaa sits down, tossing his bone on the table.  Larry takes off his tie, and Laaa takes off his squirrel tail.  Larry sighs heavily, and Laaa sighs heavily.  (Caution: d-word used)

Lancelot, in his search for his beloved Guinevere, is galloping on his horse through the busy streets of London.  Coming upon a theater with a large billboard reading, "Camelot," Lancelot believes he has reached the end of his quest.  Entering the crowded theater, where a play is already in progress, Lancelot strides down the aisle and jumps onstage.  Two actors are in the middle of their performance as King Arthur and Guinevere, but they stop when Lancelot suddenly joins them.  Lancelot proclaims his undying love for the beauty, but she only looks at him in confusion.  Hugh Jackman, the actor playing King Arthur, confronts Lancelot: "Can I help you, mate?"  Lancelot only continues with his praises to Guinevere.  Frustrated, the actress tries to explain to the knight that she is only playing a part, but nothing she says will convince Lancelot that Camelot is only pretend.  Hoping to win the heart of the queen, Lancelot draws his sword, intending to fight "King Arthur."  Hugh Jackman pulls his sword out of its hilt, revealing a stubby, wooden prop.  Lancelot, surprised: "Well, that's not real."  Guinevere: "None of it is."  Lancelot, in a state of shock, stares out over the audience as if suddenly realizing their presence.  Lancelot, muttering to himself: "It's not real."  The sudden realization of the truth hits Lancelot in a wave of anger: "Not real?  Do you know how long I've dreamed of Camelot?  For nothing!"  He begins destroying scenery until the terrified audience flees the theater.

Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb

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Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb

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